Aku & OPPO N1
This is a must-read before you shack up!
Your Cohabitation Survival Kit
Virtapay User Click here Link Download
This is a must-read before you shack up!
We love our guys and all, but aside from the 24/7 easy-access cuddle time, actually living with them can be a — how shall we put this? — challenge. Here are a few items every gal should have before she moves in with her man.
1. Earplugs
He's adorable when he snores, but sometimes you just want to get some sleep — or read a book while he watches a Mets game. No shame in that! We recommend E-A-R classic foam earplugs. They're cheap and sold in bulk, so if you lose one, it's no biggie.
2. Your own desk
Even if he's neatnik Felix and you're sloppy Oscar in your odd-couple relationship, you need a space that's your very own, uncluttered with his boy stuff. That way, if you've had a stressful day, you can unwind by sinking into Your Chair at Your Desk and playing Scrabble on Your Laptop — and then feel recharged (and pleasantly even-tempered) enough to have a delightful dinner and convo with your man.
3. TiVo
The age-old TV tug of war between what he wants to watch (Entourage, Deadliest Catch) and what you want to watch (Mad Men, The Bachelor) can be neutralized with a little device called DVR. Now all you need is a comfy couch, some
popcorn, and a contented, couple-y smile.
4. A "happy place" outside your home
When you feel stifled, you need a safe place to escape to so you can regain your sanity. One of our friends told us that her happy place of choice is Target, where she can wander the aisles uninterrupted. Other suggestions: the closest Starbucks, a gardening store, or, heck, the gourmet cheeses section at Whole Foods if you love to cook.
5. An emergency fund
In an ideal world this will totally work out (and hopefully will!), but if things go sour, make sure you have a cash reserve that will tide you over. Experts recommend six to eight months' worth of cash savings, but at the very least, make sure you have first and last month's rent. Or enough to pay for a hotel room for several days just in case.
6. A framed photo of the two of you
Things might get tough, and you might miss your single-girl apartment (RIP!), but make sure you have a pic of the two of you in a prominent place in your home — preferably a snapshot of a time when you were first dating and feeling ecstatic about each other. That way you'll never forget why you moved in with him in the first place: Because you loved him more than words can express.
copied from sheknows
Virtapay User Click here Link Download
This is a must-read before you shack up!
We love our guys and all, but aside from the 24/7 easy-access cuddle time, actually living with them can be a — how shall we put this? — challenge. Here are a few items every gal should have before she moves in with her man.
1. Earplugs
He's adorable when he snores, but sometimes you just want to get some sleep — or read a book while he watches a Mets game. No shame in that! We recommend E-A-R classic foam earplugs. They're cheap and sold in bulk, so if you lose one, it's no biggie.
2. Your own desk
Even if he's neatnik Felix and you're sloppy Oscar in your odd-couple relationship, you need a space that's your very own, uncluttered with his boy stuff. That way, if you've had a stressful day, you can unwind by sinking into Your Chair at Your Desk and playing Scrabble on Your Laptop — and then feel recharged (and pleasantly even-tempered) enough to have a delightful dinner and convo with your man.
3. TiVo
The age-old TV tug of war between what he wants to watch (Entourage, Deadliest Catch) and what you want to watch (Mad Men, The Bachelor) can be neutralized with a little device called DVR. Now all you need is a comfy couch, some
popcorn, and a contented, couple-y smile.
4. A "happy place" outside your home
When you feel stifled, you need a safe place to escape to so you can regain your sanity. One of our friends told us that her happy place of choice is Target, where she can wander the aisles uninterrupted. Other suggestions: the closest Starbucks, a gardening store, or, heck, the gourmet cheeses section at Whole Foods if you love to cook.
5. An emergency fund
In an ideal world this will totally work out (and hopefully will!), but if things go sour, make sure you have a cash reserve that will tide you over. Experts recommend six to eight months' worth of cash savings, but at the very least, make sure you have first and last month's rent. Or enough to pay for a hotel room for several days just in case.
6. A framed photo of the two of you
Things might get tough, and you might miss your single-girl apartment (RIP!), but make sure you have a pic of the two of you in a prominent place in your home — preferably a snapshot of a time when you were first dating and feeling ecstatic about each other. That way you'll never forget why you moved in with him in the first place: Because you loved him more than words can express.
copied from sheknows
Stress Is No Fun
Studies have shown that food and stress are linked. While some foods may cause angst, there are other foods that reduce stress, explains LIVESTRONG.COM nutrition advisor Alyse Levine MS, RD. She took time out of her busy schedule to talk to SheKnows.com about foods that reduce stress and the foods we need to avoid because they can actually increase stress.
It's probably safe to say that nobody enjoys being stressed out, but it is a fact of life for many, if not most of us. Job demands, family commitments, cooking, cleaning and trying to squeeze in a social call every once in a while can all take their toll. Chronic stress can lead to anxiety, depression, high blood pressure, heart disease, stroke and increased abdominal weight gain. Yikes! So what's a busy working woman to do? For starters, you can minimize stress through your diet.
Best stress-busting foods
Check out Levine's top picks for stress-busting foods to stock up on the next time you head to the grocery store:
1Pistachios
According to Levine, a 2007 Penn State study found that eating one and a half ounces (about a handful) of pistachios a day lowers blood pressure, decreasing the effects of stress on your body. "The act of cracking open a pistachio shell can also give you a break from whatever stressful activity or thought you are focusing on at the moment," the registered dietitian explains.
2Avocados
One of the best ways to reduce high blood pressure, according to the National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute, is to get enough potassium. Just half an avocado contains more than 450 milligrams of potassium – more than what you would get from a medium banana.
3Steel-cut oatmeal
Carbohydrates increase the levels of a neurotransmitter called serotonin. Serotonin makes you feel more calm and relaxed, and Levine describes it as "the anti-anxiety chemical." The more slowly your body absorbs carbohydrates, the more steadily serotonin flows, making whole grains like oatmeal a great stress-reducing food.
4Salmon
A 2003 study in Diabetes & Metabolism found that a diet rich in omega-3 fatty acids kept the stress hormones cortisol and adrenaline from soaring. Levine adds that omega-3 fatty acids also help to lower your risk of heart disease and may actually help elevate your mood. She suggests aiming for a three-ounce serving of fish, especially fatty fish like salmon, mackerel, herring and light tuna, at least twice a week.
5Spinach
Spinach is a very rich source of folic acid and has been shown to help relieve stress, anxiety, panic and even depression. Add it to salads, sandwiches and sauces or sauté it and add to pasta dishes.
6Brussels sprouts
Brussels sprouts are full of antioxidants and actually have more vitamin C than any other vegetable. Just a one-cup serving contains more than 100 percent of your daily vitamin C needs, so don't neglect these nutrient-packed powerhouses.
It's probably safe to say that nobody enjoys being stressed out, but it is a fact of life for many, if not most of us. Job demands, family commitments, cooking, cleaning and trying to squeeze in a social call every once in a while can all take their toll. Chronic stress can lead to anxiety, depression, high blood pressure, heart disease, stroke and increased abdominal weight gain. Yikes! So what's a busy working woman to do? For starters, you can minimize stress through your diet.
Best stress-busting foods
Check out Levine's top picks for stress-busting foods to stock up on the next time you head to the grocery store:
1Pistachios
According to Levine, a 2007 Penn State study found that eating one and a half ounces (about a handful) of pistachios a day lowers blood pressure, decreasing the effects of stress on your body. "The act of cracking open a pistachio shell can also give you a break from whatever stressful activity or thought you are focusing on at the moment," the registered dietitian explains.
2Avocados
One of the best ways to reduce high blood pressure, according to the National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute, is to get enough potassium. Just half an avocado contains more than 450 milligrams of potassium – more than what you would get from a medium banana.
3Steel-cut oatmeal
Carbohydrates increase the levels of a neurotransmitter called serotonin. Serotonin makes you feel more calm and relaxed, and Levine describes it as "the anti-anxiety chemical." The more slowly your body absorbs carbohydrates, the more steadily serotonin flows, making whole grains like oatmeal a great stress-reducing food.
4Salmon
A 2003 study in Diabetes & Metabolism found that a diet rich in omega-3 fatty acids kept the stress hormones cortisol and adrenaline from soaring. Levine adds that omega-3 fatty acids also help to lower your risk of heart disease and may actually help elevate your mood. She suggests aiming for a three-ounce serving of fish, especially fatty fish like salmon, mackerel, herring and light tuna, at least twice a week.
5Spinach
Spinach is a very rich source of folic acid and has been shown to help relieve stress, anxiety, panic and even depression. Add it to salads, sandwiches and sauces or sauté it and add to pasta dishes.
6Brussels sprouts
Brussels sprouts are full of antioxidants and actually have more vitamin C than any other vegetable. Just a one-cup serving contains more than 100 percent of your daily vitamin C needs, so don't neglect these nutrient-packed powerhouses.
Advice (Download Source Code)
Whether he forgot your anniversary, cheated, neglected to take out the trash or just didn’t notice your new hairstyle, moving past hurt and anger can be difficult. If you feel trapped by feelings of resentment and can’t forgive or forget, here are some strategies for moving forward.
If whatever angered you really wasn't all that significant, the best thing you can do is stop thinking about it. The more you dwell on the fact he didn't notice your new haircut for a whole week, the longer it will upset you. The only way you can move past something is by making an effort to do so.
Cursive number 2Talk it out.
Whatever has you upset should be talked about. The longer you keep your feelings bottled up, the more likely you are to explode and start a fight. Rather than just walking around seething with anger and suffering in silence, tell your partner how you feel and why you're so upset. He may not even realize he's done something to hurt you. It will help clear the air and make you feel less isolated. The more open you are about what's on your mind, the less power it has over your mood.
Cursive number 3Take a breather.
Give yourself a time out when you're feeling particularly angry or frustrated about something in your relationship. Whatever he did or neglected to do shouldn't be discussed when you're about to blow your top. Calm down and reassess the situation before figuring out a way deal with your feelings. Whether it's a few hours or a few days, some time and space can give you a new perspective and help you find a way to move past your anger.
Cursive number 4Seek outside help.
If you really can't (or won't) move past your spouse or partner's slip-up, you may need to seek outside help in the form of a marriage or couples' counselor. A third party can help you see things in a new way and ensure your partner gets a chance to explain his side -- which can be hard to allow in the throes of anger. If you want your relationship to work but can't find a path past your hurt or resentment, think about getting a professional involved.
10 Most "green" fruits and veggies
10 Most "green" fruits and veggies
It’s not hard to believe that diet is one of the major contributors to an individual’s ecological footprint. There are plenty of factors that make an impact, like the amount of fuel that is burned to deliver fresh, exotic produce. Deciding to go green in what you eat can begin by simply increasing the amount of local, plant-based foods in your diet, as fruits and vegetables are generally lower-impact items when compared to animal-derived food items. However, not all fruits and veggies are equal in their eco-impact. The amount of pesticides, fertilizer, water and even energy to store produce should be factored in when determining just how green an item is . Taking these factors into account, try these 10 green fruits and vegetables:
1 Onions
Any tears shed over these little gems should be of joy. Onions are practically pesticide-free, can be grown in almost any climate and need very little water to develop. As an added-energy-efficient bonus, they don’t require refrigeration to be stored.
2 Avocados
Full of healthy fats and technically a fruit, avocados are another item that are grown almost completely pesticide-free, whether or not they are organic.
3 Sweet corn
With low amounts of pesticides per acre of crop and moderate-to-low water consumption, corn is a front runner in the eco-friendly list.
4 Apples
Apples have low requirements for nitrogen and phosphate fertilizers per acre of cultivation and a low water footprint with just 83 gallons of water consumed per pound of food.
5 Pears
Pears are another yummy, low-water option. Similar to apples in consumption amounts and fertilizer usage, they are an often popular choice for local farmers.
6 Oranges
Depending on where you live, it may be more difficult to locate locally grown citrus. However, oranges are another green fruit that require small amounts of fertilizer, mid-amounts of pesticides (for non-organic) and little amounts of water for cultivation – just 55 gallons per pound of fruit.
7 Lettuce
Consisting of over 90% water, would you believe that lettuce needs only a small amount of water to grow? By using only 15 gallons of water per pound of food, eating more salads may decrease your dress size and carbon footprint.
8 Potatoes
Much like onions, potatoes can be found in fields across the globe because a farmer can yield a hearty and healthy crop without much care. With a low water footprint and without need for refrigeration to stay fresh, potatoes are a top green option.
9 Peas
A favorite of many home gardeners, peas do not require much fertilizer to grow and offer versatility in the kitchen.
10 Cabbage
Low-cal and a great source of vitamin C, calcium, iron, magnesium and fiber. Cabbage is also relatively easy to grow and requires very little water.
When it comes to choosing green foods, the best approach is less is more. Items that require the least amount of water and overall care will save the most in terms of impact.
copied from sheknows
It’s not hard to believe that diet is one of the major contributors to an individual’s ecological footprint. There are plenty of factors that make an impact, like the amount of fuel that is burned to deliver fresh, exotic produce. Deciding to go green in what you eat can begin by simply increasing the amount of local, plant-based foods in your diet, as fruits and vegetables are generally lower-impact items when compared to animal-derived food items. However, not all fruits and veggies are equal in their eco-impact. The amount of pesticides, fertilizer, water and even energy to store produce should be factored in when determining just how green an item is . Taking these factors into account, try these 10 green fruits and vegetables:
1 Onions
Any tears shed over these little gems should be of joy. Onions are practically pesticide-free, can be grown in almost any climate and need very little water to develop. As an added-energy-efficient bonus, they don’t require refrigeration to be stored.
2 Avocados
Full of healthy fats and technically a fruit, avocados are another item that are grown almost completely pesticide-free, whether or not they are organic.
3 Sweet corn
With low amounts of pesticides per acre of crop and moderate-to-low water consumption, corn is a front runner in the eco-friendly list.
4 Apples
Apples have low requirements for nitrogen and phosphate fertilizers per acre of cultivation and a low water footprint with just 83 gallons of water consumed per pound of food.
5 Pears
Pears are another yummy, low-water option. Similar to apples in consumption amounts and fertilizer usage, they are an often popular choice for local farmers.
6 Oranges
Depending on where you live, it may be more difficult to locate locally grown citrus. However, oranges are another green fruit that require small amounts of fertilizer, mid-amounts of pesticides (for non-organic) and little amounts of water for cultivation – just 55 gallons per pound of fruit.
7 Lettuce
Consisting of over 90% water, would you believe that lettuce needs only a small amount of water to grow? By using only 15 gallons of water per pound of food, eating more salads may decrease your dress size and carbon footprint.
8 Potatoes
Much like onions, potatoes can be found in fields across the globe because a farmer can yield a hearty and healthy crop without much care. With a low water footprint and without need for refrigeration to stay fresh, potatoes are a top green option.
9 Peas
A favorite of many home gardeners, peas do not require much fertilizer to grow and offer versatility in the kitchen.
10 Cabbage
Low-cal and a great source of vitamin C, calcium, iron, magnesium and fiber. Cabbage is also relatively easy to grow and requires very little water.
When it comes to choosing green foods, the best approach is less is more. Items that require the least amount of water and overall care will save the most in terms of impact.
copied from sheknows
How to live like you’re always on your honeymoon
How to live like you’re always on your honeymoon
A honeymoon is a chance to escape with your new spouse, make fantastic memories and begin your marriage on a positive note. Unfortunately, it sometimes represents the happiest time in a couple’s life. But, you can extend your honeymoon bliss well into your marriage by following some simple love-rekindling steps.
Take yourself back to that magical week (or two, if you were exceptionally lucky). Maybe you buried your toes in the sand as the steel drum played and you sipped Cuba Libres. Perhaps you curled up by the fire after a long day on the slopes and soaked in the hot tub. Wherever you were, memories of your honeymoon probably bring a smile to your face... and maybe make you wonder how life got so complicated. Here's how you can turn those honeymoon memories into a daily reality.
>Avoid money-related arguments
Kerry Hamm is a licensed clinical social worker with a practice based in Denver, Colorado. She reminds us that financial issues are at the heart of many arguments in a marriage. "But, on a honeymoon, money really isn't such a contentious topic," she says. "That usually happens as the marriage progresses and the responsibilities of life start piling up." Although you can't ignore financial topics altogether, it's important to make sure you are on the same page to avoid habitual arguments.
>Practice forgiveness
On your honeymoon, were you much more willing to forgive your husband than you are now? In those first few weeks after saying "I do" it seems your hubby could do no wrong. Then, life happened and his flaws and mistakes suddenly seem magnified. Bring yourself back to that time when his little idiosyncrasies were endearing and not annoying and when "I'm sorry" actually ended a disagreement.
>Schedule weekly dates
Lisa Thomas is a licensed marriage and family therapist, certified clinical sex therapist, and licensed clinical social worker based in Denver, Colorado. She stresses the importance of weekly dates with your husband. "Dedicate an hour a week to an intimate date and an hour a week to an emotional date," she says. "Emotional and physical connections are equally important in a marriage, so you need to address both on a regular basis." The time commitment is minimal when you consider that these dates help avoid really significant marital problems.
>Schedule weekly meetings
Take 30 minutes to an hour weekly to discuss the business of running a family. "Talk about schedules, financial commitments, expectations, special events and other significant topics," advises Thomas. "You want to make sure everyone is on the same page." This meeting helps you isolate deeper topics and encourages the family to tackle challenges together, essentially helping everyone to avoid sporadic arguments that take the spark out of marriage and waste precious time.
>Have plenty of sex
It's no secret that a honeymoon invites us to relax, let go of everyday burdens and really connect with our spouses on an emotional and physical level. This means lots of sex. "On a honeymoon, couples share a euphoric feeling that really draws them together," says Hamm. "They are focused on having fun, enjoying each other and exploring life together as a united team." Don't underestimate the importance of sex in a healthy, exciting marriage.
>Enjoy a shared interest
"Couples that have recently returned from their honeymoons are full of excitement about the future," says Hamm. "They've spent time talking about their dreams, goals and interests and are eager to tackle life together." Define your shared interests and take time to enjoy them. Whether it's travel, baseball, camping or photography, having an activity that you both love will keep you connected and give you something to look forward to as a couple.
>Gussy up
Brides setting out for the honeymoons are often plucked, waxed, tanned and beautified to the hilt. Then, they get home and sometimes fall into a rut. Bring back that honeymoon heart throb by making an effort to look pretty for your husband. While perfection is not a realistic or healthy goal, you can still put on his favorite dress, a dab of perfume and maybe even a flower in your hair every once in a while. He will take notice and you will feel great about yourself, just like you did on your honeymoon.
copied from sheknows
A honeymoon is a chance to escape with your new spouse, make fantastic memories and begin your marriage on a positive note. Unfortunately, it sometimes represents the happiest time in a couple’s life. But, you can extend your honeymoon bliss well into your marriage by following some simple love-rekindling steps.
Take yourself back to that magical week (or two, if you were exceptionally lucky). Maybe you buried your toes in the sand as the steel drum played and you sipped Cuba Libres. Perhaps you curled up by the fire after a long day on the slopes and soaked in the hot tub. Wherever you were, memories of your honeymoon probably bring a smile to your face... and maybe make you wonder how life got so complicated. Here's how you can turn those honeymoon memories into a daily reality.
>Avoid money-related arguments
Kerry Hamm is a licensed clinical social worker with a practice based in Denver, Colorado. She reminds us that financial issues are at the heart of many arguments in a marriage. "But, on a honeymoon, money really isn't such a contentious topic," she says. "That usually happens as the marriage progresses and the responsibilities of life start piling up." Although you can't ignore financial topics altogether, it's important to make sure you are on the same page to avoid habitual arguments.
>Practice forgiveness
On your honeymoon, were you much more willing to forgive your husband than you are now? In those first few weeks after saying "I do" it seems your hubby could do no wrong. Then, life happened and his flaws and mistakes suddenly seem magnified. Bring yourself back to that time when his little idiosyncrasies were endearing and not annoying and when "I'm sorry" actually ended a disagreement.
>Schedule weekly dates
Lisa Thomas is a licensed marriage and family therapist, certified clinical sex therapist, and licensed clinical social worker based in Denver, Colorado. She stresses the importance of weekly dates with your husband. "Dedicate an hour a week to an intimate date and an hour a week to an emotional date," she says. "Emotional and physical connections are equally important in a marriage, so you need to address both on a regular basis." The time commitment is minimal when you consider that these dates help avoid really significant marital problems.
>Schedule weekly meetings
Take 30 minutes to an hour weekly to discuss the business of running a family. "Talk about schedules, financial commitments, expectations, special events and other significant topics," advises Thomas. "You want to make sure everyone is on the same page." This meeting helps you isolate deeper topics and encourages the family to tackle challenges together, essentially helping everyone to avoid sporadic arguments that take the spark out of marriage and waste precious time.
>Have plenty of sex
It's no secret that a honeymoon invites us to relax, let go of everyday burdens and really connect with our spouses on an emotional and physical level. This means lots of sex. "On a honeymoon, couples share a euphoric feeling that really draws them together," says Hamm. "They are focused on having fun, enjoying each other and exploring life together as a united team." Don't underestimate the importance of sex in a healthy, exciting marriage.
>Enjoy a shared interest
"Couples that have recently returned from their honeymoons are full of excitement about the future," says Hamm. "They've spent time talking about their dreams, goals and interests and are eager to tackle life together." Define your shared interests and take time to enjoy them. Whether it's travel, baseball, camping or photography, having an activity that you both love will keep you connected and give you something to look forward to as a couple.
>Gussy up
Brides setting out for the honeymoons are often plucked, waxed, tanned and beautified to the hilt. Then, they get home and sometimes fall into a rut. Bring back that honeymoon heart throb by making an effort to look pretty for your husband. While perfection is not a realistic or healthy goal, you can still put on his favorite dress, a dab of perfume and maybe even a flower in your hair every once in a while. He will take notice and you will feel great about yourself, just like you did on your honeymoon.
copied from sheknows
Unique wedding centerpieces
These days many brides are looking for ways to spice up their wedding decor. Centerpieces are one of the easiest and most effective ways to do so. Though traditional flower arrangements can be gorgeous, many other centerpiece alternatives exist. Choose one of these unique table decoration ideas to help amp up your wedding reception.
Romantic vintage themed wedding centerpiece
5 ways to create unique table decor
We talked to the experts at JOWY Productions, Los Angeles’ premier and exclusive full service event and wedding planning production company, for their tips on wedding centerpieces.
>Let the season inspire you
Use your environment as a guide, especially in outdoor weddings. In the fall, think about colorful leaves, branches and pumpkins. Mini pumpkins could be used as seating cards. Go natural or artsy by spray painting elements in all gold or silver which can be striking and unique. In the winter, small evergreens, decorated with berries, or ornaments are lovely. Consider hanging escort cards on a beautiful Christmas tree for guests to find their table assignments. Summertime is perfect for glass containers filled with sand, seashells and colored sea glass. This is ideal for a beach wedding.
>Get fruity
A glass cylinder filled with fruit (lemons, limes, oranges, kumquats) at varying heights is fun, chic and colorful. Each cylinder should have its own fruit and cylinders should be arranged in groupings of three at the center of the table.
>On the rocks
When combined with pillar candles, rocks can deliver a nice, organic feel to a table. Fill a cylinder with water, submerged rocks and a floating, white candle to create a stellar, clean and romantic look.
>Let there be light
Candles provide romance, ambience and additional light. When placed at varying heights in varied vessels of size and color, candles are a great way to create a simple centerpiece. Consider using floating candles in a unique vase. If your going for an eclectic decor style, purchase different vases in various patterns, colors, shapes and sizes. Light small floating candles inside for a romantic ambience.
>Sticks and succulents
Go green with your centerpieces. Add moss and accents of candles to decorate a table that is striking and eco-friendly. You can also add a few orchid heads here and there in branches for hints of floral and softness. This is another great way to create a simple centerpiece that still provides a beautiful, romantic feel.
copied from sheknows
Romantic vintage themed wedding centerpiece
5 ways to create unique table decor
We talked to the experts at JOWY Productions, Los Angeles’ premier and exclusive full service event and wedding planning production company, for their tips on wedding centerpieces.
>Let the season inspire you
Use your environment as a guide, especially in outdoor weddings. In the fall, think about colorful leaves, branches and pumpkins. Mini pumpkins could be used as seating cards. Go natural or artsy by spray painting elements in all gold or silver which can be striking and unique. In the winter, small evergreens, decorated with berries, or ornaments are lovely. Consider hanging escort cards on a beautiful Christmas tree for guests to find their table assignments. Summertime is perfect for glass containers filled with sand, seashells and colored sea glass. This is ideal for a beach wedding.
>Get fruity
A glass cylinder filled with fruit (lemons, limes, oranges, kumquats) at varying heights is fun, chic and colorful. Each cylinder should have its own fruit and cylinders should be arranged in groupings of three at the center of the table.
>On the rocks
When combined with pillar candles, rocks can deliver a nice, organic feel to a table. Fill a cylinder with water, submerged rocks and a floating, white candle to create a stellar, clean and romantic look.
>Let there be light
Candles provide romance, ambience and additional light. When placed at varying heights in varied vessels of size and color, candles are a great way to create a simple centerpiece. Consider using floating candles in a unique vase. If your going for an eclectic decor style, purchase different vases in various patterns, colors, shapes and sizes. Light small floating candles inside for a romantic ambience.
>Sticks and succulents
Go green with your centerpieces. Add moss and accents of candles to decorate a table that is striking and eco-friendly. You can also add a few orchid heads here and there in branches for hints of floral and softness. This is another great way to create a simple centerpiece that still provides a beautiful, romantic feel.
copied from sheknows
6 Stars who make us say: ‘We get it, you’re in love’
When you're super-famous and crazy in love, sometimes a stroll down the red carpet in front of the paparazzi isn't enough -- you want the world to know just by looking at you! These celebs took the phrase "wearing your heart on your sleeve" to a whole new level:
Celebrity style PDA
1. Katy Perry: Russell Brand manicure
At the 2010 MTV VMAs, all Perry had to do was flash her nails when reporters asked her where her absent fiancé, Brand, was. For the night, his face was emblazoned on Katy's tips in this highly personalized manicure.
2. Eva Longoria: Tony Parker necklaces and tattoo
3. Demi Moore: Ashton Kutcher Twitter account
These days, a fashion statement can take the form of an online persona too. When Moore opened her Twitter account, she chose a name that left no doubt as to who her better half was: @mrskutcher.
4. Britney Spears: Kevin Federline tank top
Oh, man. Was this the beginning of the end of the Britney we knew and loved or what? Spears donned a "Mrs. Federline" wife-beater in 2004 to proclaim her love for her new hubby, backup dancer Federline. The pair divorced in 2007 after having two children, but Federline wasn't done makin' bacon: He's currently expecting his fifth child with new girlfriend Victoria Prince.
5. Johnny Depp: Winona Ryder tattoo
It's safe to say that Depp probably wasn't thinking ahead when he got "Winona Forever" tattooed on his right arm. After his and Ryder's 1993 breakup, he removed only part of the tattoo to form the new sentiment "Wino Forever." Bizarre, but "bizarre" is exactly what makes Johnny Depp so hot.
6. Jessica Simpson: Tony Romo jersey
Who needs a blue-and-white Dallas Cowboys jersey when you can totes wear a nice pink version to your boyf's football game, right, Jessica? Errrr... maybe not. Despite Simpson's show of support in a pale pink number-9 shirt at ex-boyfriend Romo's December 17 game back in 2007, Romo played the worst game of his career that day, leading sports commentators to speculate that she was cursing the team. They even named the run of bad luck the "Jessica Jinx." Awkward. Romo dumped Simpson in 2009 the day before her 29th birthday, so maybe he deserved that curse.
Don't think they're the only celebs wearing their love where everyone can see it. Recently Tori Spelling unveiled her Dean tattoo while pregnant and in her bikini. Check it out >>
copied from sheknows
10 Sweet surprises to brighten your day
Once you get that out of the way, here are some other simple joys that will help you enjoy each and every day:
Bust it out.
One of the fastest ways to brighten things up at the end of a long, stressful day -- or right in the heart of it -- is to let go and dance. Not a mechanical two-step... really dance! Lock the door if you need to, turn up the music (for real, or at least the music in your head), and let loose. Dancing is uplifts fast because it sparks areas in your brain that make you feel happy and energetic.
"What's the best thing that happened to you today?"
Ask someone you care about to just chat about her day. You have no idea what it will mean to her.
Shoot the birds & the bees.
...With a camera, that is! The average adult spends 90 percent of life indoors. For many reasons, spending so much time inside walls and under artificial lighting is bad for your physical, mental and emotional health. Getting outside and indulging in nature, even if it is only for 20 minutes, is a sure way to boost your mood. And by taking even just a few pictures of the natural scenes around you -- birds, bees, clouds, flowers, trees -- you will get your focus off stressful thoughts quickly.
Buy a flowering plant.
Bring the outside inside with houseplants. A NASA study found that certain houseplants can be highly effective at detoxifying the air in your home, in addition to being visually uplifting.
Laugh -- Even if nothing is funny.
Many studies show that laughter is indeed the best medicine. But the laughter doesn't even need to be real: Recent studies also show that even fake laughter produces amazing benefits that include stress and pain relief, lower blood pressure, better brain function and mood improvement.
Transform the grumpy.
Compliment the grumpiest-looking person you can find on something -- shoes, jewelry, eyes or whatever stands out to you. Or at least share a passing joy with him about the weather. For example, tell someone who is not smiling, "I bet you have a beautiful smile" -- and then watch as that smile unfolds.
Listen to your power songs.
Pop on your favorite tune and remind yourself that you feel powerful, upbeat, alive, etc. Send the YouTube link for the most upbeat song in your head to a friend who needs a little smile.
Ignite yourself with newness.
Push your boundaries and try something new. It doesn't have to be monumental, but listening to a different type of music, reading an article in a different genre, taking a different route home, or trying an ethnic food that you've never had before can help stop your mind from being cranky. Instead, it will concentrate on the novelty.
Be quiet.
Constant noise causes stress. Put in noise-eliminating headphones and enjoy complete silence for 20 minutes -- oh, and no talking, either.
Do something good -- anonymously.
Clean all the litter off your neighbor's patch of lawn. Place a 5-dollar bill in a teenager's backpack. Write a note that says, "I just wanted you to know that someone in this world thinks you are a really beautiful person" and place it under a random windshield.copied from sheknows
4 Types of Tea
Tea is one of the most popular after food drinks in the world, but still very few people are aware that there are four inherently different flavours and types of tea one can find in every supermarket. Each tea is made out of different ingredients and each tea has its advantages and disadvantages. I will explain.
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What you should always remember is that there are only four types of tea.
1) Black tea
2) Green tea
3) White tea
4) Oolong tea
All these are made from the leaves of the Camellia sinensis, also known as the tea plant. Other herbal infusions such as chamomile tea, ginger tea or red tea made of rooibos leaves are disqualified as types of tea since the tea plant is not involved in their making. The difference between the four tea variations lies in the process of making them. In addition, each type of tea has another flavor and various health benefits.
1) Black Tea
The strong flavored burnt Sienna colored hot beverage is the most popular type of tea in the West. Either served with a squeeze of lemon or added milk and a cube of sugar, the cup of black tea is part of daily tea ceremonies that take place worldwide. Black tea is made of heavily oxidized Camellia sinensis leaves. When served plain, it contains no calories, carbohydrates, or fats. A cup of black tea contains more caffeine than any other types of tea but less than in any cup of coffee.
2) Green Tea
The lightly oxidized tea has been popular in China, Japan and Korea for centuries. Recently, rumors on its health benefits increased its popularity in the West as well. It has been proven that drinking green tea can lower cholesterol, prevent cancer, increase metabolic rates and be helpful in variety of other conditions and illnesses. The green tea is lightly oxidized, dried, but not fermented. It is usually served plain, without sugar or milk. Since some of the green tea variants taste a bit bitter, it should be brewed in lower temperature than the boiling point. <
3) White Tea
White tea is rarer and more expensive than the other types of teas mentioned above. Originated in the Fujian province of china, the white tea is made of young Camellia sinensis leaves, which go through a long process of steaming or frying, inactivate fermenting and drying. Since the leaves are harvested while the buds are still covered by white hair, it is called white tea. White tea has the most delicate, sweet taste than the other types of tea. Moreover, it contains the smallest amount of caffeine and the largest amount of antioxidant that help prevent cancer.
4) Oolong Tea
The traditional Chinese tea is the common companion of Chinese foods such as dim sum and chop suey in American Chinese restaurants. The oolong tea, black dragon in Chinese, got its name after its long, dark distinguished leaves that look like wild black dragons when brewed. The unique taste of the oolong tea is achieved by a long process that includes sun drying of the Camellia sinensis leaves, light oxidization, cooling and drying processes. The result is a lighter flavor than the popular black tea and stronger than the delicate green tea.
Virtapay User, please click here!
Cafe suite 3502 download
What you should always remember is that there are only four types of tea.
1) Black tea
2) Green tea
3) White tea
4) Oolong tea
All these are made from the leaves of the Camellia sinensis, also known as the tea plant. Other herbal infusions such as chamomile tea, ginger tea or red tea made of rooibos leaves are disqualified as types of tea since the tea plant is not involved in their making. The difference between the four tea variations lies in the process of making them. In addition, each type of tea has another flavor and various health benefits.
1) Black Tea
The strong flavored burnt Sienna colored hot beverage is the most popular type of tea in the West. Either served with a squeeze of lemon or added milk and a cube of sugar, the cup of black tea is part of daily tea ceremonies that take place worldwide. Black tea is made of heavily oxidized Camellia sinensis leaves. When served plain, it contains no calories, carbohydrates, or fats. A cup of black tea contains more caffeine than any other types of tea but less than in any cup of coffee.
2) Green Tea
The lightly oxidized tea has been popular in China, Japan and Korea for centuries. Recently, rumors on its health benefits increased its popularity in the West as well. It has been proven that drinking green tea can lower cholesterol, prevent cancer, increase metabolic rates and be helpful in variety of other conditions and illnesses. The green tea is lightly oxidized, dried, but not fermented. It is usually served plain, without sugar or milk. Since some of the green tea variants taste a bit bitter, it should be brewed in lower temperature than the boiling point. <
3) White Tea
White tea is rarer and more expensive than the other types of teas mentioned above. Originated in the Fujian province of china, the white tea is made of young Camellia sinensis leaves, which go through a long process of steaming or frying, inactivate fermenting and drying. Since the leaves are harvested while the buds are still covered by white hair, it is called white tea. White tea has the most delicate, sweet taste than the other types of tea. Moreover, it contains the smallest amount of caffeine and the largest amount of antioxidant that help prevent cancer.
4) Oolong Tea
The traditional Chinese tea is the common companion of Chinese foods such as dim sum and chop suey in American Chinese restaurants. The oolong tea, black dragon in Chinese, got its name after its long, dark distinguished leaves that look like wild black dragons when brewed. The unique taste of the oolong tea is achieved by a long process that includes sun drying of the Camellia sinensis leaves, light oxidization, cooling and drying processes. The result is a lighter flavor than the popular black tea and stronger than the delicate green tea.
Don't Be A Slave To Your Things
Do you have things like a bicycle, jetski, or swimming pool that sit unused? Is it that you don't have time to use them because you have to work so much just to pay for them? Sometimes it seems like all the things we own somehow own us.
The bad news is that it's often true. We have to arrange our lives around our things. You get a new truck that can go anywhere, but you're too busy working to go there. Someone is out fishing while you are putting in overtime to pay for your fishing boat. You use your large-screen television a lot, but does it sufficiently reduce the debt-stress that came with it?
Break The Chains!
The good news is that there's a better way. Actually, there are three better ways. First, know what you really value. Second, use cash instead of debt. Third, learn how to look at costs and benefits.
Will you really enjoy that $2,000 mountain bicycle enough? Maybe. This isn't about right or wrong desires. It's a question of truly seeing your own values. Think back to things you've bought but not used, or not used enough. What truly enjoyable things could you do with that money if you had it now? You've got to be self aware and honest.
Cash is king. The price may seem the same, but put those things on a credit card and, with interest, you'll pay a lot more. Cash means you have to save and wait a little for things, but you can buy more and have less stress. Credit cards provide the illusion of a richer life. Escaping debt gives you the reality.
Finally, learn to understand costs and benefits. A friend once came to the realization, using pen and paper, that his jetski cost him $300 for every hour he used it the first year. Loan interest, gas, insurance, depreciation, repairs, licenses - these things add up. And he thought it was too expensive to pay $100 per day to rent one! Consider the real costs of things, and look for a cheaper way, or at least make an honest decision that it's worth $300 per hour to you.
Your things should be making your life better. If they aren't, you need to start looking at them differently. Don't let your things own you. Change your approach.
The bad news is that it's often true. We have to arrange our lives around our things. You get a new truck that can go anywhere, but you're too busy working to go there. Someone is out fishing while you are putting in overtime to pay for your fishing boat. You use your large-screen television a lot, but does it sufficiently reduce the debt-stress that came with it?
Break The Chains!
The good news is that there's a better way. Actually, there are three better ways. First, know what you really value. Second, use cash instead of debt. Third, learn how to look at costs and benefits.
Will you really enjoy that $2,000 mountain bicycle enough? Maybe. This isn't about right or wrong desires. It's a question of truly seeing your own values. Think back to things you've bought but not used, or not used enough. What truly enjoyable things could you do with that money if you had it now? You've got to be self aware and honest.
Cash is king. The price may seem the same, but put those things on a credit card and, with interest, you'll pay a lot more. Cash means you have to save and wait a little for things, but you can buy more and have less stress. Credit cards provide the illusion of a richer life. Escaping debt gives you the reality.
Finally, learn to understand costs and benefits. A friend once came to the realization, using pen and paper, that his jetski cost him $300 for every hour he used it the first year. Loan interest, gas, insurance, depreciation, repairs, licenses - these things add up. And he thought it was too expensive to pay $100 per day to rent one! Consider the real costs of things, and look for a cheaper way, or at least make an honest decision that it's worth $300 per hour to you.
Your things should be making your life better. If they aren't, you need to start looking at them differently. Don't let your things own you. Change your approach.
Lowongan Pekerjaan PT Kenari Djaja Prima
PT Kenari Djaja Prima
Closing Date: 8-May-11
PT. KENARI DJAJA PRIMA , berkedudukan di Jakarta Adalah perusahaan yang bergerak dibidang retail dan proyek yang menyediakan produk perlengkapan pintu dan jendela.Closing Date: 8-May-11
Estimator ( Kode : ER )
(Jakarta )
Requirements:- Wanita
- Umur 30 tahun
- D3/ S1 Arsitektur, Teknik Sipil
- Fresh Graduate
PT.KENARI DJAJA PRIMA
JL. Pinangsia Raya No. 16 BC
Attn. HRD MANAGER
hrd@kenaridjaja.co.id atau anner@kenaridjaja.co.id
based on jobvacancy
Public Speaking Tips
If you search in Google for the term "public speaking tips" you get roughly 2.6 million responses. That seems like a lot, but when you have to be the one standing in front of the group there isn't enough information in the world that could get you over that fear.
Believe it or not, most of those fears are self imposed. What do I mean? The people listening to you don't really care how the information is disseminated, they just want at the information. It's the speaker that puts themselves through the ringer weeks before the event. Here are some tips that may seem obvious, but once completed, will really put your mind at ease, trust me.
Public Speaking Tip #1
KNOW YOUR TOPIC! I don't mean know your topic, I mean inside and out, upside down, what ever question someone could throw at you, you know the answer. You really need to be prepared to reach this level. You need to know your speech almost by heart; you need to know the products you will be discussing. Do your homework, you will know you have reached public speaking Nirvana when you get that "feeling", it will come with knowledge. Believe!
Public Speaking Tip #2
Greet as many of the attendees prior to your speech as possible. Familiarity promotes confidence. Besides, think of the benefit you provide the topic you are to speak on when you take the time to meet people before you go on.
This strategy also prevents you from pacing back and forth and worrying yourself to death until you go on. There is no point in cramming now, if you don't know it, you wont, and it will show.
Public Speaking Tip #3
DON'T think everyone in the audience is naked, this in fact will hurt your chances of a successful public speaking outing.
Public Speaking Tip # 4
When you find yourself with only a mouthful of uhs and ums, stop yourself, repeat the sentence as if to add importance, and replace the uhs and ums with silence to allow your points to hit home.
Public Speaking Tip # 5
Animate your speech. Most people think that good communication is mouth-centric. Nothing could be farther from the truth! To be a powerful communicator, you have to use your entire body. Gestures and body language add energy and enthusiasm to your speech.
These are tips can really help you take your next step in public speaking. Do you realize that people pass up promotions because they will be required to speak publicly?
Do you realize people fear speaking in public more than they fear dying? Maybe because dying is abstract and appears far away while the podium is right in front of them. Either way, you really can come to grips with your fear and maybe you won't enjoy it, but you'll be able to get through it easier. I can't emphasize enough that half of your battle will be just knowing what you are going to say, and anticipating what others are going to ask. It can be easy!
Believe it or not, most of those fears are self imposed. What do I mean? The people listening to you don't really care how the information is disseminated, they just want at the information. It's the speaker that puts themselves through the ringer weeks before the event. Here are some tips that may seem obvious, but once completed, will really put your mind at ease, trust me.
Public Speaking Tip #1
KNOW YOUR TOPIC! I don't mean know your topic, I mean inside and out, upside down, what ever question someone could throw at you, you know the answer. You really need to be prepared to reach this level. You need to know your speech almost by heart; you need to know the products you will be discussing. Do your homework, you will know you have reached public speaking Nirvana when you get that "feeling", it will come with knowledge. Believe!
Public Speaking Tip #2
Greet as many of the attendees prior to your speech as possible. Familiarity promotes confidence. Besides, think of the benefit you provide the topic you are to speak on when you take the time to meet people before you go on.
This strategy also prevents you from pacing back and forth and worrying yourself to death until you go on. There is no point in cramming now, if you don't know it, you wont, and it will show.
Public Speaking Tip #3
DON'T think everyone in the audience is naked, this in fact will hurt your chances of a successful public speaking outing.
Public Speaking Tip # 4
When you find yourself with only a mouthful of uhs and ums, stop yourself, repeat the sentence as if to add importance, and replace the uhs and ums with silence to allow your points to hit home.
Public Speaking Tip # 5
Animate your speech. Most people think that good communication is mouth-centric. Nothing could be farther from the truth! To be a powerful communicator, you have to use your entire body. Gestures and body language add energy and enthusiasm to your speech.
These are tips can really help you take your next step in public speaking. Do you realize that people pass up promotions because they will be required to speak publicly?
Do you realize people fear speaking in public more than they fear dying? Maybe because dying is abstract and appears far away while the podium is right in front of them. Either way, you really can come to grips with your fear and maybe you won't enjoy it, but you'll be able to get through it easier. I can't emphasize enough that half of your battle will be just knowing what you are going to say, and anticipating what others are going to ask. It can be easy!
why do you need raw juice therapy?
When I was a kid, my mom used to make me different kinds of juices like orange, tomato, and carrot juices. I always like them until now as they do increase the appetite.
But, I wasn't sure about the benefits until one day, when I got older; I saw my aunt consumed so many juices everyday.
I noticed that this was part of her cancer treatment. She got better after an intensive course of consuming 13 glasses of juices each day. An example of her juice combinations is orange, carrot, and dark leafy greens.
Thanks to the juice therapy she is still with us until now.
Today, there are more and more people consuming fruit and vegetable juices as part of their lifestyle to increase healthy life. They think it is the simplest form of prevention and cure.
Most sicknesses are the direct result of the lack or deficiency of vitamins, minerals and salts needed by the body to function properly. It's important for us to make sure we have enough of those substances. Raw juice therapy can be the answer.
Raw juice therapy is a way of healing and preventing sickness through an exclusive diet of fruits and vegetables juices. It is also the most effective way to bring back health and restore the body.
Based on the http://healthlibrary.com, here are some juices needed to cure some ailments:
1. Sore Throat – apricot, grapes, lemon, pineapple, prune, tomato, carrot and parsley.
2. Headache - grapes, lemon, carrot, lettuce and spinach.
3. Colds – lemon, orange, grapefruit, pineapple, carrot, onion, celery and spinach.
4. Influenza – apricot, orange, lemon, grapefruit, pineapple, carrot, onion and spinach.
5. Allergies – apricot, grapes, carrot, beet and spinach.
6. Eye Disorders: apricot, tomato, carrot, celery, parsley and spinach.
7. Constipation - apple, pear, grapes, lemon, carrot, beet, spinach and watercress.
8. Diabetes – citrus fruits, carrot, celery, lettuce and spinach.
9. Acne – grapes, pear, plum, tomato, cucumber, carrot, potato and spinach.
10. Asthma – apricot, lemon, pineapple, peach, carrot, radish and celery.
You may drink the juice every three hours or take five to six times a day until you feel better. The quantity of juice on each occasion may be 250 ml on the first day and increased by 50 ml each succeeding day 'till you can take 600 ml on each occasion.
If you want to do raw juice therapy, here are things you must consider to give the best juice for your body:
• Drink the juice immediately after you make it.
• Use only fresh ripe fruits and vegetables.
• Extract fruits and vegetables only as much as you need for immediate consumption.
• Oxidation happens rapidly in fruit and vegetables after you make them into juice. If you store them too long they might lose the medicinal value. For example, apples turn brown so quickly.
• Add water if the juice is too sweet, especially for diabetics.
Enjoy your favorite juice…
But, I wasn't sure about the benefits until one day, when I got older; I saw my aunt consumed so many juices everyday.
I noticed that this was part of her cancer treatment. She got better after an intensive course of consuming 13 glasses of juices each day. An example of her juice combinations is orange, carrot, and dark leafy greens.
Thanks to the juice therapy she is still with us until now.
Today, there are more and more people consuming fruit and vegetable juices as part of their lifestyle to increase healthy life. They think it is the simplest form of prevention and cure.
Most sicknesses are the direct result of the lack or deficiency of vitamins, minerals and salts needed by the body to function properly. It's important for us to make sure we have enough of those substances. Raw juice therapy can be the answer.
Raw juice therapy is a way of healing and preventing sickness through an exclusive diet of fruits and vegetables juices. It is also the most effective way to bring back health and restore the body.
Based on the http://healthlibrary.com, here are some juices needed to cure some ailments:
1. Sore Throat – apricot, grapes, lemon, pineapple, prune, tomato, carrot and parsley.
2. Headache - grapes, lemon, carrot, lettuce and spinach.
3. Colds – lemon, orange, grapefruit, pineapple, carrot, onion, celery and spinach.
4. Influenza – apricot, orange, lemon, grapefruit, pineapple, carrot, onion and spinach.
5. Allergies – apricot, grapes, carrot, beet and spinach.
6. Eye Disorders: apricot, tomato, carrot, celery, parsley and spinach.
7. Constipation - apple, pear, grapes, lemon, carrot, beet, spinach and watercress.
8. Diabetes – citrus fruits, carrot, celery, lettuce and spinach.
9. Acne – grapes, pear, plum, tomato, cucumber, carrot, potato and spinach.
10. Asthma – apricot, lemon, pineapple, peach, carrot, radish and celery.
You may drink the juice every three hours or take five to six times a day until you feel better. The quantity of juice on each occasion may be 250 ml on the first day and increased by 50 ml each succeeding day 'till you can take 600 ml on each occasion.
If you want to do raw juice therapy, here are things you must consider to give the best juice for your body:
• Drink the juice immediately after you make it.
• Use only fresh ripe fruits and vegetables.
• Extract fruits and vegetables only as much as you need for immediate consumption.
• Oxidation happens rapidly in fruit and vegetables after you make them into juice. If you store them too long they might lose the medicinal value. For example, apples turn brown so quickly.
• Add water if the juice is too sweet, especially for diabetics.
Enjoy your favorite juice…
Is Love Really Blind?
"Is love really blind?" I wonder. Having been happily married (and some of the times not so happily) for 30 years, I cannot help but ask myself more frequently whether my love is blind. Unsurprisingly to myself, the answer seems to be affirmative. How else would I have been able to go through the various difficult times in our relationship? Logic would dictate that we would have broken up by now. The next question I have been asking is whether it had been good that my love is blind.
I found an interesting section in the book "An Introduction to Positive Psychology" by WC Compton with the title "Is Love Really Blind?". What you will find in the rest of the article is based on what Compton wrote together with my thoughts.
In our minds, very often, we have pictures of our partners that are inaccurate. We have what is called "positive romantic illusions" about our partners. These illusions explain why we are oblivious to the faults of our partners and so enamoured of them.
While it is true that these illusions tend to fade with time, it is also true they can also strengthen with times, albeit with different characteristics.
In the former, when marital problems surface, and if the illusions disappear completely, it might lead to eventual marital breakup. Fortunately, most of the times, the illusions might weaken but do not disappear completely. The remnant illusions might help to weather the storms in the relationships.
In the latter case, the marriage might stay strong even though there may be many situations and incidents that might wreck a weaker relationship. We might even increase our willingness to accept many apparent faults and mistakes, and even idiosyncrasies, of our partners. Let us examine why this happens.
It has been found that couples who idealized their partner's attributes, or had exaggerated beliefs about their control over the relationship, or were overly optimistic about the future of their relationship, were happier. Their relationships were also more stable and lasted longer.
These observations lead me to draw the following inferences/conclusions:
It is through the positive romantic illusions about our partners that explain why we choose our partners and not someone else.
The positive romantic illusions about our partner help us to stick to our partner even during bad times and under otherwise unfavourable conditions.
We might continue to deliberately keep a biased positive view of our partner so as to maintain, or even enhance, the relationship.
There is mutual enhancement of the positive romantic illusions that partners have for each other.
People are more committed to spouses who see them in positive light.
However, should the stress present in the couple's life lead to strains in the relationship, the positive romantic illusions might begin to fall apart, leading each partner to realize they have been fooling themselves about the qualities of their partners. Without the presence of the positive romantic illusions, the relationship can then deteriorate very rapidly.
Overall then, it is good for couples to maintain the positive romantic illusions they have. This way, they will remain 'in love' and continue to experience all the joys of romantic love.
References:
www.succezz.com/StresstheSilentKiller.html
www.succezz.com/How2BHappy.html
www.succezz.com/S2/7WaystoLiveLiftotheMax2.html
I found an interesting section in the book "An Introduction to Positive Psychology" by WC Compton with the title "Is Love Really Blind?". What you will find in the rest of the article is based on what Compton wrote together with my thoughts.
In our minds, very often, we have pictures of our partners that are inaccurate. We have what is called "positive romantic illusions" about our partners. These illusions explain why we are oblivious to the faults of our partners and so enamoured of them.
While it is true that these illusions tend to fade with time, it is also true they can also strengthen with times, albeit with different characteristics.
In the former, when marital problems surface, and if the illusions disappear completely, it might lead to eventual marital breakup. Fortunately, most of the times, the illusions might weaken but do not disappear completely. The remnant illusions might help to weather the storms in the relationships.
In the latter case, the marriage might stay strong even though there may be many situations and incidents that might wreck a weaker relationship. We might even increase our willingness to accept many apparent faults and mistakes, and even idiosyncrasies, of our partners. Let us examine why this happens.
It has been found that couples who idealized their partner's attributes, or had exaggerated beliefs about their control over the relationship, or were overly optimistic about the future of their relationship, were happier. Their relationships were also more stable and lasted longer.
These observations lead me to draw the following inferences/conclusions:
It is through the positive romantic illusions about our partners that explain why we choose our partners and not someone else.
The positive romantic illusions about our partner help us to stick to our partner even during bad times and under otherwise unfavourable conditions.
We might continue to deliberately keep a biased positive view of our partner so as to maintain, or even enhance, the relationship.
There is mutual enhancement of the positive romantic illusions that partners have for each other.
People are more committed to spouses who see them in positive light.
However, should the stress present in the couple's life lead to strains in the relationship, the positive romantic illusions might begin to fall apart, leading each partner to realize they have been fooling themselves about the qualities of their partners. Without the presence of the positive romantic illusions, the relationship can then deteriorate very rapidly.
Overall then, it is good for couples to maintain the positive romantic illusions they have. This way, they will remain 'in love' and continue to experience all the joys of romantic love.
References:
www.succezz.com/StresstheSilentKiller.html
www.succezz.com/How2BHappy.html
www.succezz.com/S2/7WaystoLiveLiftotheMax2.html
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3 Tanda Hubungan Anda Berada Di Jalur yang Benar
3 Tanda hubungan Anda berada di jalur yang benar based on sheknows
Jika Anda dalam hubungan yang melewati tahap cinta yang baru tapi tampaknya di suatu tempat antara berkomitmen penuh dan penuh cinta, Anda mungkin bertanya-tanya apakah ia akan bertahan dengan Anda. Berikut adalah beberapa indikator tanda terbesar yang cocok dengan cinta Anda
Jika Anda dalam hubungan yang melewati tahap cinta yang baru tapi tampaknya di suatu tempat antara berkomitmen penuh dan penuh cinta, Anda mungkin bertanya-tanya apakah ia akan bertahan dengan Anda. Berikut adalah beberapa indikator tanda terbesar yang cocok dengan cinta Anda
Hubungan Anda berada di jalur yang benar jika ...
1. Anda bisa menjadi diri sendiri.
Ini mungkin adalah indikator keberhasilan terbesar hubungan: Merasa cukup nyaman untuk menampilkan semua sisi kepribadian Anda, baik dan buruk. Anda harus merasa baik tentang setiap bagian dari diri Anda dalam suatu hubungan, bukan hanya bagian-bagian yang Anda pikir dia akan melihat. Kami tidak menyarankan Anda bertindak seperti orang gila mengamuk di sekitarnya, tetapi jika Anda tidak khawatir tentang dia melihat aspek Anda kurang positif, bisa jadi itu adalah cinta.
2. Anda mempercayainya.
Jika Anda dengan seseorang yang Anda percaya dan dapat mengambil kepercayaan dan tanpa otak Anda selalu bertanya-tanya apakah dia menceritakan seluruh kebenaran. Kepercayaan sulit didapatkan, tetapi dapat mengangkat hubungan ke tingkat yang lebih tinggi.
3. Anda senang bersamanya.
Jika Anda merasa seperti Anda tidak menikmati diri Anda sebanyak yang Anda lakukan dalam beberapa bulan pertama, Anda mungkin perlu mengevaluasi kembali situasi ini. Di sisi lain, jika Anda tidak bisa tidak menikmati diri Anda sendiri ketika Anda dengan dia, tidak peduli apa yang Anda lakukan (baik itu berbelanja, memasak atau menonton film), dua orang pemain Anda berada di jalan menuju kesuksesan. Kesenangan Anda miliki dengan seorang pria di awal hubungan Anda mungkin berbeda dengan menyenangkan Anda miliki sebagai kemajuan hal, hal-hal yang baik jika Anda masih bersenang-senang.
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